


A fossa and a marten make fun of another fossa and their two goons.

by legalgood



Category: Original Work
Genre: F/F, Gen, there's a slight innuendo so that's why it's teen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-06
Updated: 2016-07-06
Packaged: 2018-07-22 00:02:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7410424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legalgood/pseuds/legalgood
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>this was something I wrote for <a href="http://shiitaketissues.tumblr.com/">shiitaketissues</a> in exchange for a lovely piece of artwork.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A fossa and a marten make fun of another fossa and their two goons.

**Author's Note:**

> Cast:
> 
> • Ferox Kerajaan Faatura – they/them, sassy fossa royalty
> 
> • Miuraol “Deathspeaker” of Sairas – she/her, chief physician and seer of the Ferox of Sairas, Faatura’s sarcastic marten girlfriend
> 
> • Bluudgut – he/him, an unlucky ferret
> 
> • Redwart – she/her, an unlucky stoat
> 
> • Wairangi Skepna – they/them, an oblivious, perpetually annoyed fossa
> 
> • Ferox Kerajaan Ariki – he/they, Great King of Sairas, Faatura’s father
> 
> \----  
> {a note: the fossas replace the “i” sound with the “y” sound, except for in names.}

“Hail the great Ferox,” Miuraol said bitingly as Faatura entered her chamber. The fossa cackled.

“Good to see you styll have the proper respect!” They joked back, grinning with too sharp teeth.

“But of course, m’lord.” Miuraol bowed, grinning back with equally sharp teeth. “What’s to do on the agenda today?”

“You,” Faatura couldn’t resist quipping back.

“I had figured as such,” Miuraol smirked. “What else?”

“Perhaps terroryzyng Skepna and theyr two goons, yf yt please you.”

“If it’ll please me, Ferox? Since when has the great Ferox allowed a servant’s opinion above their own?”

Faatura tapped their temple, as if reconsidering their words. “Never. We’re doyng that anyway. Askyng was merely a formalyty.”

“But of course, o great Ferox.” Miuraol linked their arm with the fossa’s. “We shall go and do that now, o Ferox, if it please you.”

Faatura cackled as they marched with the marten out of the room.

–

“Uhh, boss, wot’s we doin’ t’day?” Bluudgut asked, scratching his head with a claw, gingerly. A few days ago, he had been scratching his head, when Skepna had shouted, and he had accidentally dug his claw into his head, leaving a scar, and causing immense pain. He had learned his lesson, and now scratched his head with minimal chance of leaving scars.

Skepna smacked Bluudgut’s paw away from his skull. “Stop that. You look lyke an ydyot!” The fossa fumed. They hated staying at Sira Fadar, because their cousin, the heir to the throne, Ferox Kerajaan Faatura, and the court seer would go out of their way to make fun of Skepna and their cronies. This time, they were staying for a month. It was the first week in, and already Skepna had reached the end of their rope.

“Er, yer fossaship, the terrible duo’s on der way ‘ere!” Redwart called from her position in the hall. Skepna’s claws kneaded their temples, and the fossa groaned.

“Yt ys too early for thys!” They whined, lips then curling into a snarl. “Well, fools, have ye rehearsed yer lynes?” The pair nodded. Prior to their arrival at Sira Fadar, Skepna and their friends had come up with a list of combacks to Faatura and Miuraol’s mean remarks. Now was their chance to test them out.

–

“Well, well, well. What do we have here, physycyan?”

“A fine pair of weasels, I believe. Oh, and is that a fossa? Or a very large rat?”

“Watch your mouth, marten! Y am royalty!” Skepna blurted, growling.

“Aye, Miur, better watch that mouth of yours, after all, they are royalty,” Faatura laughed cruelly. “But Y’m royalty too, and hygher yn rank, so Y’m free to ynsult that oversyzed vole.”

“Uhh…” Bluudgut stammered, trying to remember the lines he had ‘carefully’ rehearsed. “Yer a bunch of slime-furred rogues! Great bullies, pickin’ on our poor boss!”

Faatura and Miuraol glanced at each other before breaking into cackles. They clutched their sides, and could not speak for a few minutes. Miuraol recovered first, and shot back, “Oh, if yon rat can’t ‘andle it, we’ll leave them alone to cry for their mommy, right, o great Ferox?”

“Aye, Miur. Yf the baby’s too sensytyve, we’ll leave them alone to sob.”

“Wayt! Y’m strong! Ye great bunch of bullyes! Y’ll tell your father about thys!”

Faatura laughed as they and Miuraol walked back down the hallway, towards Miuraol’s chamber.

–

“FEROX KERAJAAN FAATURA!” A voice broke through Faatura’s thoughts. They were lying near Miuraol, who was reading a book aloud. Faatura groaned.

“Well, the lyttle rat told.” True to their word, Skepna had told Faatura’s father, Ferox Kerajaan Ariki, that they and Miuraol had made fun of them. “Care to joyn me for the lecture?” Faatura rose to their hindpaws and extended a paw to Miuraol. The marten took the proffered paw, smiling.

“Gladly. It was partly my doing, after all.”

–

“Would you explayn why you found yt necessary to bother your cousyn?” The Great King of Sairas asked his offspring.

“Yt ys typycal for royalty to act above the peasantry, ysn’t yt?”

“Faatura. Skepna ys your cousyn, and royalty. Your arguments are not grounded yn fact.”

“Neyther ys our famyly hystory.” Ariki’s eyes narrowed, and his claws dug into the plush armrests of his throne.

“That ys besydes the poynt, Faatura.”

“Y’m goyng now, Great Ferox. Unless you’d lyke to argue another ‘poynt’?” They said pointedly. “Now yf you excuse me, Y have ymportant thyngs to do.”

“Lyke what?”

“Me,” Miuraol piped up. Ariki’s face went a peculiar shade of crimson, and Faatura threw back their head and howled, taking Miuraol by the arm and walking out of the throne room.

**Author's Note:**

> this was originally posted on [my tumblr](http://rangapaw.tumblr.com/post/132470457110/a-fossa-and-a-marten-make-fun-of-another-fossa-and).


End file.
